It is not uncommon that painful past experiences in life cause us to wear tattered clothing of shame, perfectionism, self-protection, and self-promotion. I know this too well because I did it all too often. We “orphan” ourselves when we have an unwillingness to live inside our story (even the most painful parts). We then abandon who we were/who we are (and what happened) in favor of who we’re supposed to be. We live inside windowless shacks built upon the phrase, “I will not be ___________ again.” The bricks of that shack are past hurt, abandonment, abuse, lies, being taken advantage of, fear, and resentment about being forced to experience a sizable amount of pain so early in life.
But worthiness and acceptance of ourselves at the core “adopt” the orphan and, through a lot of time and diligence, make whole what was broken.